Well tonight is “guys night” at my house but before you conjure up images of men getting all sweaty and inebriated over a football game or huddled in a circle with cigars hanging tentatively from the corners of their mouths while they try to out bluff one another in a game of poker, I should clarify that my husband is a geek who wears this label proudly (if you didn't already figure that out from the title of my blog...) The fact that he probably hasn’t played a team sport since he was forced to in high school gym (sorry honey, paintball doesn’t count) is something he’s not really concerned with.
Around our place, guys night is a little different. Firstly, it doesn’t necessarily involve just guys. My husband is non-gender discriminatory when it comes to his letting lose time. That being said, it isn’t exactly as though girls are lining up to participate either. He even tried to get me involved at one point but I had to admit to him that there were other things I’d rather be doing….like laundry. Secondly, it doesn’t matter who shows up because “they” don’t tend to stick around for. Before my very eyes the man I love so well turns into something I no longer recognize. Sometimes he’s a holier than thou 4th level paladin, other times he’s an ugly full bearded thieving dwarf. While I’m sure many of you have caught on I should probably let the rest of you in on the fact that guys night for my husband means D&D.
Now a lot of non-geek women out there would probably be terrified if their homes were invaded by goblins and other worldly creatures on a regular basis but I have come up with 5 simple steps to make the process if not less frightening at least manageable.
1-Stock the cupboards-This is something that probably holds true for any guys night so it’s an easy place to start. While the traditional foods (beer, pizza, chips etc.) will most likely make you a hero (or an epic level wife) in all the guys eyes, you can always take it to the next “level”. If they’re playing classic D&D 4th Ed. you could make them some cyclopsicals or maybe some burgers with “Gorgon”zola cheese. If they’re playing something Star Wars inspired there are entire cookbooks dedicated to themed food. If all else fails, I’ve heard Mountain Dew and Cheetos are always geek crowd pleasers.
2-Get to know your partner's character-This might feel a little weird if you are very new to the whole gaming thing but it doesn’t have to be. In reality it can keep your relationship interesting and you might find out some new and appealing things about your loved one. If you aren’t sure where to start, and your significant other has (bless his heart) tried to keep his obsession to himself, try listening in on the game from time to time. Bringing in food from step one can give you access to the game without having to participate if you don’t want to but if you’ve decided to vacate the premises entirely during his games you can always look at his character sheet when he’s not around. Then, simply use the information you gathered to break the ice. For example “Honey, I noticed that your character has a hook instead of a hand, how did that happen?” When listening in on a game of D&D I learned my husband did a very sexy Russian accent. If you don’t enjoy roll playing with your partner’s friends, you might enjoy it with them......not my thing but I do enjoy hearing that accent.
1-Stock the cupboards-This is something that probably holds true for any guys night so it’s an easy place to start. While the traditional foods (beer, pizza, chips etc.) will most likely make you a hero (or an epic level wife) in all the guys eyes, you can always take it to the next “level”. If they’re playing classic D&D 4th Ed. you could make them some cyclopsicals or maybe some burgers with “Gorgon”zola cheese. If they’re playing something Star Wars inspired there are entire cookbooks dedicated to themed food. If all else fails, I’ve heard Mountain Dew and Cheetos are always geek crowd pleasers.
2-Get to know your partner's character-This might feel a little weird if you are very new to the whole gaming thing but it doesn’t have to be. In reality it can keep your relationship interesting and you might find out some new and appealing things about your loved one. If you aren’t sure where to start, and your significant other has (bless his heart) tried to keep his obsession to himself, try listening in on the game from time to time. Bringing in food from step one can give you access to the game without having to participate if you don’t want to but if you’ve decided to vacate the premises entirely during his games you can always look at his character sheet when he’s not around. Then, simply use the information you gathered to break the ice. For example “Honey, I noticed that your character has a hook instead of a hand, how did that happen?” When listening in on a game of D&D I learned my husband did a very sexy Russian accent. If you don’t enjoy roll playing with your partner’s friends, you might enjoy it with them......not my thing but I do enjoy hearing that accent.
3-Know the basic rules, creatures and acronyms-This is handier if you plan to be around when the guys are playing because let me tell you it can save you from some embarrassment. Critical hits are not the most important rock and roll hits of all time. If they see a nightwalker, they probably aren’t ogling a fictitious prostitute and his buddy’s sweet new mini is probably not the type that he’s going to take you for a spin in later. There are probably hundreds of acronyms but each group of gamers will use them to a different extent. I suggest flipping quickly through the PHB (Players Handbook) the MM1 (Monster Manuel 1) and any other book specific to the setting that they are playing in, if not to avoid confusion for yourself, to win brownie points. Hey, we women need them too from time to time.
4-Stay out of it-unless you are prepared to get involved-really involved. I myself have not been so brave. I personally knew it wasn’t for me when on many occasions I chose to participate as an observer and within 10 minutes of the game, after I’d flipped through the Monster Manual to find the ugliest creature, I fell asleep. To this day some of my best naps have taken place during D&D. While I can see the appeal of transporting yourself to another world to fight evil (or create chaos depending on the character) it really is my husband’s thing-not mine. And that’s ok. But, if you want to get involved it requires both a time and financial equipment. Borrowing other players’ books gets old when you’re trying to create a new character or get a grasp on the rules and I’ve personally seen games last upwards on five hours but I’ve heard stories of all night sessions. Not only that but it takes a true passion to play this game. Your Game Master may penalize you for not playing with enough passion. You could find yourself forced to cluck like a chicken each time someone says your name, and really, who wants to do that?
And finally, if you can’t embrace the gaming lifestyle remember one thing:
5-Be open minded-we women do weird stuff too. My husband may give me a funny look while I’m plucking my eyebrows but he never tells me to stop or do it less often. He will probably never understand why I straighten my wavy hair but complain when it’s too straight, or why I can only wear certain jeans with certain sweaters but only when the moon is full and there’s a 40% chance of rain but he always tells me I look beautiful after I’ve changed for the thousandth time. In the same manner, even if you think gaming is weird, childish or pointless, you should be able to accept that it’s something your partner loves to do and their happiness should be more than enough for you to allow a troop of adventurers into your house on a weekly basis.
5-Be open minded-we women do weird stuff too. My husband may give me a funny look while I’m plucking my eyebrows but he never tells me to stop or do it less often. He will probably never understand why I straighten my wavy hair but complain when it’s too straight, or why I can only wear certain jeans with certain sweaters but only when the moon is full and there’s a 40% chance of rain but he always tells me I look beautiful after I’ve changed for the thousandth time. In the same manner, even if you think gaming is weird, childish or pointless, you should be able to accept that it’s something your partner loves to do and their happiness should be more than enough for you to allow a troop of adventurers into your house on a weekly basis.
No comments:
Post a Comment